Haggard post-inebriatation 5 o clock shadow could swiftly become sexy and cool 6 o clock shade in one confusing miasma of many as the British Government consider tinkering with the wayward clocks.

Let's just say that whole smoke thing isn't looking very good.

The world awoke today to discover that the South Koreans are blowing raspberries across the border; Ryan Mortlock pretends he knows what is going on with an excess of dog kebab.

A gay judge overrules the infamous Prop 8 in California; massive gay orgy ensues. Watergate and the Wincest investigate.

"It was only a couple of bullets"

Fortunately, most of the Pakistani branch of Al Quaida will not be participating on account of them having drowned.